Collaborative Divorce

Collaborative divorce is a family law procedure by which the two parties agree that they will not go to court, or threaten to do so.  The parties strive to reach a fair settlement through a series of four-way meetings between the two parties and their lawyers.   This new approach to conflict resolution was created in the early 1990s by a Minnesota family lawyer named Stu Webb, who saw that traditional litigation was not always helpful to families, and often was damaging.  Its popularity is increasing dramatically. The collaborative law movement has spread throughout the United States, Europe, Canada and Australia.

The key document in a collaborative case is the participation agreement. It is a contract signed by the participants, which sets forth the rules for the process. The parties and lawyers agree that:

   1. The lawyers will not litigate the case. If the settlement process fails, and litigation is the only recourse, the original attorneys must withdraw and the parties must retain new lawyers;
   2. Neither party will take advantage of mistakes by the other side.
   3. The parties will freely disclose all pertinent information and will not hide any material facts;
   4. What is said in the settlement meetings remains confidential; and
   5. Everyone will behave courteously and in good faith.

Collaborative divorce makes use of a team approach to help the couple make fully-informed, carefully considered settlement decisions. When appropriate, the group brings in outside consultants to help resolve the conflict. Where the couple has minor children, a mental health professional is often brought in as "child specialist" to educate the parents as to the developmental needs of children, and to present options for parenting plans and schedules. Divorce coaches are used in to help each participant clarify his or her needs, plan for the future, and stay focused throughout the negotiations, all of which reduce the normal anxiety often experienced in the divorce process. The coaches in collaborative practice are present and future focused.

In addition to mental health experts, neutral financial experts are also brought in as needed. Some of the ways a financial expert helps are to valuate the worth of a business, present options for dividing the assets or retirement funds, and help explore options for ensuring financial security for the parties. A financial coach may be used to help educate a party who has not been involved in managing the family finances over time and needs extra support to learn the necessary information in order to negotiate effectively. The coaches focus on supporting the needs of one or the other clients; the child specialist and financial specialist are neutral, which saves each party hiring his or her own expert.

Studies are just being published which establish the effectiveness of a collaborative approach. Anecdotally, lawyers and clients are reporting that it can be quicker, cheaper and less painful than a typical divorce. Best of all, the collaborative approach helps all the family members come through the divorce with the least amount of trauma and distress. Because the parents aren't fighting, the children adjust better.

One of the most important features of collaborative divorce is a pledge signed by each lawyer to withdraw if either of the parties decides to go to court. Since both lawyers would lose the clients if an agreement is not reached, they have an extra incentive to help their clients to cooperate and find solutions that honor the concerns of both parties.

Collaborative divorce may not be a viable option in certain situations. If there is domestic abuse, drug or alcohol addiction, serious mental illness, or an intention to hurt the other party emotionally or financially, traditional litigation may be more appropriate. Collaborative law differs from mediation. In mediation the mediator is a neutral third party who doesn't represent either side, though each party usually has a lawyer available to consult with throughout the mediation process.

Please be sure to visit www.hardinglaw.com, the website for the law firm of Harding & Associates, for more information on California family law.

Comments

[Philadelphia Divorce]

Collaborative divorce is a good process. For more simple cases, mediation and straight uncontested divorce may be appropriate instead.

[Krischa Esquivel]

Collaborative divorce is an excellent concept! Unfortunately, as mentioned in the article, it's not always an option if one spouse's goal is revenge and punishment. For all those without an angry, vindictive spouse, I say divorce collaboratively!

[deborah101]

Yes, I agree! Collaborative divorce makes use of a team approach to help the couple make fully-informed, carefully considered settlement decisions. Divorce counseling is not a bad idea to take on, but A challenge in marriage. It only shows how you will carry the status of relationship that you have. Why it's now shaky and unhappy marriage. I have once into a hard times of my marriage life. Good thing I was so collaborative about divorce. And thankful I have read about this site http://www.divorceguide.com/ which they state clear visions about divorce. Indeed, they have helpful guide and information about divorce.

[Virginia Divorce Lawyers]

In many divorce cases, parents specifically agree that their children will attend college and sometimes even establish what contributions they will make. The court can modify these arrangements to the extent that the parents’ ability to contribute has changed, but the fact that the child is attending college is a given when the parents have agreed to provide for a higher education in their divorce decree.

[Family Law Solicitors Leeds]

I think this is a really interesting, and healthy principle, but does it leave divorcing couples with fewer options?

Divorces can be lengthy and complicated, and the attitudes, wants, and needs of the individuals can change throughout the process.

I think this could be a good tool for legal professionals and their clients, as long as it's used in the right circumstances. Nice post.

[Cheryl Gowin]

We are a counseling firm that works with couples who are moving toward divorce. I am sure you agree, No one likes the idea of disputes among couples and we always seek to help the couple reconcile first. But, sometimes disputes can't be resolved. We have found working with the legal staff, adding financial, life coach and counseling expertise to help people involved in unresolved disputes come to a resolution that is working for everyone involved. ,.... Without destroying any chance the couple has to be positive parents going forward.

[Attorney Ed Sherman, the California Divorce Expert]

I'm glad to see collaborative law gaining popularity and attention. Some people say that collaborative divorce is expensive, but it has a good track record and even with all the professional services that might be utilized by collaborative divorce attorneys in a case, such as an accountant, therapist, child specialist or financial planner, it will still cost less than a court battle. In my view, that's a great deal. Before hiring a collaborative divorce lawyer, I recommend you find out how many other such cases he or she has conducted. Ideally, you want someone with some serious experience.

[new jordans]

I was thinking about writing a post on this exact subject.Thank you.

[Mach Law]

Great article! The divorce can be a very stressful process, especially to the children, and I applaud the collaborative divorce since it helps in minimizing the damage and stress that is given to both parties. Remember, you have to be happy to be alive, and collaborative divorce can give you that one more step, closer, to a happier life.

[Tracy Timby]

John...you are so right. I have a collaborative divorce firm in Pennsylvania and your quote, "the least amount of trauma and distress. Because the parents aren't fighting, the children adjust better." is right on.

The ability to have a divorce coach work with your children is one amazing aspect of collaborative divorce. Not to mention research has shown that how a couple conducts themselves during a divorce has a far greater impact on their children than the actual divorce.

[coach purses]

The best formula for happiness is to be able to develop the ability to tolerate frustration , to have a personal involvement and commitment , and to develop self-confidence and self-esteem.